10 Things I Struggle With (And You Probably Do Too)
1. I compare myself way too often.
Oh boy, this one is bad. I find myself looking at what other people have and what others can do ALL THE TIME. One thing I compare a lot is my hair. I’ve always had curly hair growing up, and sometimes it can be pretty unruly. In fact, some mornings I wake up and look in the mirror and have an afro reflected back at me. Sometimes I wish that my hair would just be long and straight. Maybe you struggle with this same thing - maybe it’s your body, maybe it’s a relationship, followers, likes, successes, whatever it may be - you are not meant to compare yourself to others. It’s hard to embrace at times, but you have been given the gifts you have for a reason.
2 Corinthians 10:12 “We do not dare to classify or compare ourselves with some who commend themselves. When they measure themselves by themselves and compare themselves with themselves, they are not wise.”
2. I worry about a lot.
Ahh yes, I do this often. What do people think of me? Will others like me? Am I accomplishing enough? Do I look okay? Man oh man, I worry about things. Sometimes I get caught up in numbers - I worry whether or not I’m making a big enough impact, whether or not I’m fulfilling God’s plan for me, whether or not people like me as a person. But guess flippin’ what? We aren’t supposed to worry about a thang. We’ve all really gotta learn how to let go and let God.
Philippians 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. “
3. Sometimes I don’t feel like I am good enough.
I look at someone and think, “She’s gorgeous. Why can’t I look like that?” I don’t have perfect hair or big boobs or a perfect figure, so I begin to put my worth into what I look like compared to others. Sometimes I also look at people who seem to know what they’re going to do with their lives and think, “Goodness, why can’t I have it all put together like that?” I worry that I’m not pretty enough, that I’m not nice enough, not successful enough, not liked enough. The one thing that I struggle to realize is this: I am enough. And so are you. God has fearfully and wonderfully made us, and we are more than enough.
Psalm 139:13-14 “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.”
4. I try to be perfect at everything.
Sometimes I place my worth into what I do. As a result, I begin to feel this pressure to be excellent at everything. I want to strive for perfection always. I sometimes forget that it’s not what I do, but who I am. We’ve got to relax and just use the talents God has given us without worrying about the rest. It is God who makes us perfect in our paths, not what we do ourselves.
Psalm 18:32 “It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect.”
5. I care way too much about what other people think.
I’ll admit it: I’m a struggling people pleaser. I get caught up in making people happy a lot. I want people to like me. At times, I try to gain the world. Sometimes I allow myself to get wrapped up in what others say. But here’s the thing… the world will always let us down. There will always be people that don’t like us. We have to learn how to boldly and confidently be who God has created us to be and live the life He has called us to live. We’re not here to live for the world, so we shouldn’t waste so much energy on trying to please it.
Galatians 1:10 “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.”
6. I can sometimes be a control freak.
I love my planner. I love to color code and highlight and make to-do lists. I especially love crossing off things on the to-do lists. I try to plan a lot of things. And oftentimes, I begin to forget to let God do His thing. I forget to surrender control to Him. We’ve got to learn how to let God take our hand and show us the way rather than navigate it blindly ourselves.
Proverbs 19:21 “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.”
7. Sometimes I’m pretty selfish.
Wow, I can really forget to look up sometimes. I get so wrapped up in what I’m doing, in my own checklists, in my path, that I forgot to help others fulfill whatever it is their called to do. I forget to shed light on other people and think of them. Sometimes I get caught up in thinking that my own troubles are mountainous and forget to realize how small they are standing beside others. We must learn to put others before ourselves and be selfless. It’s not about us.
Luke 9:23 “And he said to all, ‘If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.’”
8. I dwell on things.
My boyfriend says I have a “filing cabinet brain,” meaning I can sort through my brain and bring things up from the past. I used to really dwell on the past a lot - my mistakes, my failures. But I’ve realized something: worries, doubts, and fears live in this moment only if I give them life. We have to realize how to live and learn, letting God carry the burden we try to place on ourselves.
Philippians 3:13-14 “But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”
9. I can be impatient.
… especially when it comes to food. Sometimes I can get a little hangry. I’m also impatient in other ways - like when a blog doesn’t do as well as I thought it would or someone doesn’t do what I would like them to when I want them to. But I’ve had to learn how to just take a deep breath and relax, trusting that things will work out in the end. We need to have the strength to step back and pray, letting God open the doors when He knows it’s time for us to walk through.
Galatians 6:9 “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.”
10. I expect way too much.
The bar is set very high at times. I have ideas in my head of what I want to accomplish, what I want to impress upon others, how I want others to react, what I want others to do. But wow - I’ve really realized lately how much better life is when you just give and not worry so much about the taking. It’s so much better when you give without expecting anything in return. God promises us that when we give, it will be given to us. So we should not worry about when or how it will happen… we should trust that in God’s timing, it will. There is freedom in that.
Proverbs 11:24-25 “One gives freely, yet grows all the richer; another withholds what he should give, and only suffers want. Whoever brings blessing will be enriched, and one who waters will himself be watered.”
So no, I am not perfect. Not even close. I have struggles just like you. You are not alone in them. So know that everyone’s got something going on. Stop comparing, stop fretting, stop living for the world. Be real. Be true. Be happy with your mess, because we’ve all got one. Use your struggles to strengthen.